shall i serve?

Monday, August 5

Last PDAY after logging off our GML ( ward mission leader)
called and told us he had a surprise PDAY planned for us and to meet
up around 3 o'clock.
Just minutes after getting off of the phone with him,
the elders called telling us they would be running
SUPER late. They were going to be doing service
and asked if i would make them lunch and bring it
to them.
I gladly accepted.
Sister Tolman and i spent the morning shopping
and trying to find a doctor for me here in KASSEL... still love saying the word Kassel

We had a few minutes to spare so we ran into Saturn
( a best buy of sorts... nerd centrum )
I was looking for a little mp3 player seeing as how
my ipod hasn't worked for 4 months... and as much as 
i love listening to the CDs the elders loaned us...

Instead i got distracted and bought a few film classics
in GERMAN for occupying the RM down time when i am home..
Despicable me, Up, Elf, Emporer's new groove.. etc.etc.etc.

after we wandered the store for awhile we spotted the elders trying to hide
'' ohhhhhh .... heeeeeeeyyy Sisters.. didn't see ya there,''

hey elders..
So how bout that '' service''

Well after that awkward encounter we all met up with the GML.
We got in his car and it began to POUR!!!
I've never seen a storm like it. I was in HEAVEN!
After 25 minutes and nooooo clue where he was taking us, he
pulled over and said... '' your home!'

I looked out the completely foggy and non visible window ,
due to the small hurricane that had just happened and said ''
uhhhhh this isn't our apartment..'' ( the building wasn't
a skyscraper like ours is that we now live in )

Sister Tolman gasped and grabbed my hand and said

I hopped out of the car to take a closer look at the street sign..
I was able to read it and just began to cry
Dormanweg 10
I was standing DIRECTLY in front of the home where my grandpa diederich and his family
lived during the war.

Everyone waited in the car while i had a moment to myself.
just bawwwwlllinngg and absolutely drenched.. so it masked the
tears quite nicely.

I had waited my whole life to see it! And was waiting to go find it on a day
where i prepared myself emotionally so i wouldn't look like a wreecckkk.

Everyone eventually joined me outside and together we walked
around and took photos.

Directly on the side of the building was the bomb shelter that 
saved their lives multiple times. It was surreal standing
right outside the place i had heard so many childhood stories about!

I had shown them the address last week after my mom forwarded an e-mail
from my Uncle Hugo giving me the address.

It was so humbling to stand where my poppy stood as a boy growing up
and staring at the bomb shelter door that I heard so much about.

I was so humbled that the elders and the ward mission leader planned
this surprise field trip for me. I am surrounded by amazing people.

Well like every other good old week in the life of Sister d.
I was at my weekly injection appointment when the doctor
noticed my skin and eyes were yellow..
She ran some tests and found inflammation and infection in my
throat, ears and nasal cavities..

I am a lil over achiever and managed to get a:

Sinus Infection
Ear Infection
Throat Infection
all at once.
and i gotta tough it out OLD SCHOOL pioneer style and am not allowed
to take medicine.

noooo... not because of my lack of means or pioneer crazy big miracle faith.
But because of these weekly shots i get for now and forever more.. I'm not
allowed to have whatsoever any kindof antibiotic in my system.
Soooo basically im toughin out the most painful infections


She took what felt like to be 1000 samples and bloodwork and then
shoved this cotton bandage mole skin stuff with ointment in
my ears and said:
''bis nächste wohke''

------ uhmm you left that crap in my ears..
Yes.. leave it in till next thursday.. OH and don't get your ears wet..


Ive got strict orders to rest and law low till its better.... kiiiinddaa
like when i got my operation and then went and did street contacts..
the next day.


I can sleep when i die.
naja this time I will obey my mission presidents wife requests and actually get better.
Being so sick has really been a pain as a missionary.. i'm not gonna lie.
Thinking about what i pictured my mission to be... weekly hospital
visits were NOT one of them.But the more i look back on all the hard times and late
night emergency room visits.. I realize how much i've grown on my mission..
I got an email this week from an adorable girl whose getting ready to serve.
She like probably all missionaries before leaving have noticed that now
more than EVER before.. Satan is working his absolute hardest!!
I scrolled through some old emails and found this one i wrote a while back..

'' I've noticed Satan works the HARDEST on those he knows is capable
of making the BIGGEST difference in building his kingdom...

but you know who also knows that?

Our father in heaven.
He called us to do his work because he TRUSTS us.
A few years back i was someone who wouldn't of bet EVERYTHING i owned
that i would be where i am today. I made so many mistakes.. spent more time 
running from seminary teachers ( literally) than learning from them.

I'm not a poster child for the church or for this work.. But i give my 100%
every. single. day and that is what matters.

I know the atonement of Jesus Christ is REAL. My words i felt would never be
enough for what this beautiful message we have deserves.''
I don't know the scripture mastery.. I sometimes catch myself flipping
through the bible looking for scriptures that are clearly NOT found there.
I am not perfect.. But the Lord doesn't ask us to be perfect..

That is the atonement of Jesus Christ.. not just for sinners. But for all
of us. Our weaknesses, sorrow, trials and our flaws.. He makes up for the rest.
This time between getting a mission call and going on a mission..
Was the toughest time i had during this whole process..
Just like when Joseph Smith knelt in the grove.. Satan knew what
great things would come to pass from that humble prayer.
I think that is just like just about ANYTHING that happens in our lives.
But i know that God is a UNCHANGING god of miracles..
Missions are amazing.. I've never been so happy and could not express
how sad i am to say that mine will soon end. MORE JOY AWAITS
then ever before for those who embark on this service.
To THAT i give my testimony.. Missions are amazing. 
The church is so true. The Lord is so mindful of us and answers
our prayers.. sometimes not how we expect.. and other times even
through people around us. Mission calls are inspired and this is HIS

I know i feel I have been put through the refiners fire.. but i won't move till its done.
I may never be the perfect missionary or have it all figured out

but hey.... noone asked me to be I was asked to try
keep it loose. keep it tight

line of the week:
nothing this week..
just that all you lucky folks in AMERICA best be enjoying shark week for me..
germans hate sharks.. and noone knows what im talking about when i mention
this beautiful week..
if you don't talk about gardens, weather, pets, or war stories over here... your an outsider
team america

sister bella d

bomb shelter

poppy's apartment



  1. What an amazing experience! And some not so great ones too. You're so strong!!

  2. Ofcourse! He calls you and that is why you are here.

    God Bless!

    link tothe family international flirty fishing